NEZEL PADAYHAG: “5 Types Of Fear That Are The Opportunities To A Positive Change In Your Life”

Considered to be an emotional response triggered by an imminent threat, our fear is the greatest challenge we all need to face and overcome in our life.

If our fear is always being avoided, it will become a monster that locks us up in the dark prison of our minds.

We hide, we run, we act stupidly just to avoid fear. And the more we resist it the bigger monster we create of it.

The truth is, fear has full control of us because we don’t live in the present moment, but in our mind, and in our mind fear can be anything.

Fear is a protective program, it’s not against you. But if we let fear to make the decisions for us it will protect us to the point where we find ourselves locked within our own prison.

Behind every fear there is a truth that needs to come out into the open. Every kind of fear is just a door that hides some truth inside.

Once you find the courage to open what’s hidden inside, you will find the biggest opportunities for growth and evolution in your life.

There are different types of fear. We are affected by different type of fear at different points in our life depending on what we need most for growth and what holds us back.

Here are the 5 most common fears that are disguises for big opportunities. Find the one that has the biggest effect on you right now and see what kind of truth it’s within.

5 Types Of Fear That Are The Opportunities To A Positive Change

1. The fear of change.

You’re afraid of change because familiarity breeds comfort. Like a child who doesn’t want to lose sight of his mother on the first day of school, you don’t want to get out of your comfort zone because it’s where you feel protected and secure.

But as you grow older and start to see the world, you realize how small your awareness had been.

Had you not let go of the sight of your mother, you would not have known another world that is open for you to explore.

If you’re afraid of change, you deprive yourself of growing, evolving, and of testing your limits. The fear of change keeps you locked up in an unhappy place, be it a toxic relationship or unfulfilling career.

This fear is an opportunity to accept the inevitability of change and proactively step out of your comfort zone and grow. It highlights the limits of your comfort zone so you will know where growth and evolution begin.

2. The fear of being alone.

Most often, the fear of being alone is prompted by your own feelings of insecurity. You don’t feel secure with yourself because you feel you’re not good enough on your own.

You have been used to relying on other people for your security and happiness. Dependence isn’t the same with sharing and working together.

Being separated from your mother as early as infancy makes you feel disconnected. As a child, you have an unmet need that needs fulfillment.

But as you grow up you can take care of yourself. This dependency, if not overcome, creates a fear of being alone.

And ironically, if you do not spend time alone you cannot prove to yourself that you can be just fine by yourself, hence, you cannot overcome this illusion of dependency.

If being alone is one of your fears, it only means you need to work on your self confidence and self worth.

Once you’re confident to spend time being alone, without feeling less, you will find your own self worth. You will begin to see that a lot of people are like family.

Look into this fear and provide comfort to your inner child. It’s one way of healing yourself from this fear.

This fear is an opportunity for you to become self sufficient and independent. It highlights all the things you think you cannot do by yourself. Look at these things and do them by yourself. Each activity will reveal more of your self worth.

3. The fear of standing for your own truth.

Being conditioned to get validity from others for every word that you say leads you to be afraid of standing for your own truth.

Even if you know your idea is much, much better than that of the common belief, you refuse to speak thinking others might disagree.

This fear might have started in your childhood when you experienced bullying or when you were ridiculed by your immediate family or caregivers for saying your truth.

As a result, you guard yourself against anything that doesn’t feel comfortable, hiding your true self.

But your truth is a gift not anyone possesses. No one can see things the way you do. When you follow your own truth, you attract like minded people who want to live freely like you.

The way to get out of the cocoon you have built for yourself is to open up and be your genuine self.

This fear is an opportunity for you to be and express more of yourself. It highlights where you are incongruent in your reality. Use this knowledge to tell your truth and your reality will reshape with things you love and resonate with.

4. The fear of trying.

You’re afraid to try because of the possibility of failing, or succeeding, which is what terrifies us the most.

It’s normal to fail. Only a few endeavors succeeded with the first try. Most successes passed through the bridge of failures. And we think we want to succeed.

But most often, we are terrified of both of them. In fact, we are afraid of trying because it means we will face reality and it’s either not the way we think it is, or it is and we are right.

Either we are wrong and we cannot fantasize anymore, or we are right and we might get the results we want and they are disappointing in reality.

In both cases, we cannot fantasize about our results. We face reality and we either fail or see it’s not like we fantasized.

The fear of trying comes from loving our fantasy for the result more than the result itself. But reality is better than fantasy, even if it’s not exactly how we fantasized it.

This fear is an opportunity for you get what you want to get. It highlights the things that really matter to you. Use this fear to see the things you really want to get, however, let go of fantasizing and try to actually get them.

5. The fear of rejection.

The fear of rejection has something to do with being afraid of not being good enough. It’s how society conditioned us to feel.

But if you’re able to tweak your mindset a bit you’ll see that rejection only means something better is within you and you are not showing it.

If you believe your lack of certain skills caused you to get rejected, then do something to improve those skills.

If you are scared of being rejected because you doubt you are good enough, open yourself to rejection.

In both cases you will improve yourself to be the best version of yourself. The point of this is the realization that the rejection has nothing to do with who you really are.

If you get rejected it has nothing to do with the real you. We are all good enough, but thinking that some outside factor can validate us makes us not good enough.

Open yourself to these things and be rejected, you’ll either see all the skills you want to improve or you’ll see they were never really a factor to tell your worth.

This fear is an opportunity for you to become the best version of you. It highlights all the things keeping you from becoming your best self. You do this with giving your power away to them by seeking validation. You decide your own worth.

 

~via LifeCoachCode.com

DERIC LEWIS: “3 Signs You Have A Strong Personality That Might Scare Some People”

Have you ever encountered someone with a powerful, independent personality? Did you feel like it was off putting, like the person might be hard to like? Chances are you simply didn’t understand the kind of person you were interacting with. Often times, these types of people can come off as aggressive, rude, overly opinionated or just plain bitchy. Chances are it feels like they are trying to dominate you, or make you feel insignificant. In actuality, nothing could be further from the truth. .

Dominant, aggressive, rude, arrogant. These descriptors actually do not typify a person with a powerful, independent personality at all. In fact, strong people are often some of the biggest teddy bears, and emotionally available people you will ever have the chance to meet once you make a genuine effort to get to know them. It’s just that people with strong personalities tend to give the meeker, more mild of us a bad rap.

Those people with strong personalities do not have to win, nor do they want to necessarily. It’s not about being better than anyone else. They typically just are not willing to let other people walk all over them, or put up with being used and abused.

Sure, sometimes strong people might be intimidating to you. But that is only as a result of you noticing their outward manifestation of their inner self confidence, and lack of need to seek validation from their peers. Do you have a powerful personality? Here are eight signs that you have a strong personality that might scare some people.

You Are Cautious, Maybe Even Picky About Who You Let Into Your Life

As a person with a strong personality, you do not rely on other people to define who you are, or what you are capable of. You recognize that some people need to put others down to make themselves feel better. Here’s the thing about being picky: it forces you to have high self-esteem and you build a great connection with your own self: you build your own voice of what you want and what works for you. Its not that you don’t necessarily get along with people, its just that you know exactly what you want in your relationships and social exchanges, and you aren’t willing to settle for less.

Even if you are still trying to discover your own identity, you know that you do not need a significant other, boss, best friend or family member to tell you what you’re capable of, or how to accomplish your goals.

You Can’t Stand Trivial Conversations

Conversations about the weather, and trivialities are often unbearable, and uncomfortable. If you have a powerful personality, you probably spend a lot of time thinking deeply, and have a lot of ideas to share. You do not want to waste time talking about things that in the long run don’t really matter all that much, when you could be spending your energy changing the world.

You might feel like you are bad at small talk. But that is not true. Anyone can make small talk. You are simply uncomfortable with meaningless pleasantries. Unfortunately, our culture has deemed small talk a social necessity. Wikipedia even goes so far as to describe it as a “social lubricant”, which makes it sound a whole lot more fun than it actually is. Small talk is meant to be light and fun. It flees from depth and meaning. Personal questions are considered inappropriate. Likewise, any emotion besides happy or neutral is discouraged. Consequently, authenticity dies on the vine. The truth is that small talk allows two people to have an entire conversation without really getting to know each other. Instead of being light and fun, the conversation is flat and boring. It is like a game of chess where both players always know each other’s next move. It is a predictable exchange, with predictable results. For people with a powerful personality, it is one of those annoying hurdles we must cross to get to the good stuff.

You Are Irked by Insensitivity, Idiocy or Willful Ignorance

Strong personalities are the result of being thoughtful and well-informed, as well as being confident in their mental prowess.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ANNA LEMIND: “Why Do We Feel Lonely In An Over-Connected World?”

I believe people who feel ‘lonely’… are the ones who are ‘disconnected’ their Higher Self… but I get the gist of this article… 😀

Why Do We Feel Lonely In An Over-Connected World?

The world has never been so connected as it is now. Communication and internet technologies have made it possible to stay in touch with anyone no matter where they live. Today, it’s probably impossible to find a person who doesn’t use social networks and instant messaging apps, which have become an integral part of our life. Many people can’t even imagine their daily routine without online communication and feel incomplete if they don’t chat with their friends and don’t see their updates in the Facebook feed st least once a day. We are basically never alone and yet, we are lonelier than ever.

This is not just a claim – studies show that the number of people who feel lonely is constantly increasing. For example, a survey by the Mental Health Foundation found that one out of ten people in the UK often feels lonely while 48% of the respondents believe that modern people are getting more and more lonely.

It seems that the feeling of loneliness is a real epidemic of our society. But why do we feel this way while numerous ways of communication with other human beings are available to us at any minute of every day? To answer the question the title of the article asks, first of all, let’s figure out what loneliness actually is. While the dictionary suggests that it’s a state of being alone paired with the feelings of sadness and isolation, loneliness is far more complex than that.

Have you ever been in a company of people you didn’t have much in common with? Or maybe in a company of strangers/acquaintances who were good friends with each other and didn’t pay much attention to you? If you have been in similar situations, you will agree that in those times, you were feeling lonely without being alone.

This is what loneliness really is – a lack of connection and understanding, no matter if you are alone or not. In fact, this feeling may be even more intense when you are among people you don’t resonate with rather than when you are by yourself. Let me cite Robin Williams here: “I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone.”

So isn’t it the reason why we are so lonely in an over-connected world we live in today? Popular culture and our excessive reliance on the social media have basically made us believe that human communication is about quantity, not quality.

To demonstrate this contradiction, let me ask you two simple questions: How many friends on Facebook do you have and how many of them do you have a really deep connection with? I bet that most of you have hundreds of Facebook friends and yet can name only a few individuals you are truly close to.

As you see, what we lack in the modern world is a deep and meaningful connection with other people, which inevitably makes us feel lonely. We are constantly surrounded by people (if not physically, then at least virtually) and yet, we rarely feel truly close to someone mentally and emotionally.

If you think about it, it makes sense why human communication has become so superficial, since the entire mainstream culture is based on superficiality and shallowness. We are made to believe that all we need is to satisfy our physical needs and fulfil our selfish desires.

To sum up, remember that the only way to avoid loneliness is not about being and communicating with people all the time. It’s about establishing a deep connection with the right people along with being a self-sufficient individual who doesn’t need approval from others.

Note from Ascension Avatar: IDEA: How about BEing and communicating with Higher Self?😀

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~TheMindUnleashed via IN5D.com

 

 

 

 

LAUREN MARTIN: “Simple Life: 10 Things People Who Love Being Alone Never Worry About”

BLOG-NOV3

I’m a recluse as much as the next guy… At least, that’s what I thought.

After a recent move to a city that welcomed one too many nights out and one too many clubs to name, I came to the harsh realization that my aversion to nights out and the company of others was not normal and I was coming off as, well, rude.

I thought there was nothing wrong with choosing to spend Friday night in the company of myself and my empty apartment.

I thought it was okay to enjoy walking alone more than with a friend. I thought it was healthy to relish in all those moments of solitude.

To people trying to be my friend, or at least use me as a pawn in their game of nights out, I was the antithesis of everything they wanted.

I tried to make myself go out more, push myself to spend Friday nights in the company of others and try to enjoy all that mindless chit chat that came with money spent on too many drinks.

Soon, I began to hate myself and those around me. I started worrying about insignificant nonsense that shouldn’t bother me.

And after one too many nights spent around everyone but myself, I decided that enough was enough and I would spend as much time alone as I ******* please.

I like my company, even if it’s just a little too much, because there’s something beautiful about being at peace with yourself. There’s something comforting about knowing I can come home to myself every night and love it.

There should be more respect for people who can relish in themselves. There should be more admiration for those who aren’t scared of being alone.

There should be some nice words about the loners and the introverts who are content with themselves and don’t need anyone to feel better.

Because loving your alone time is many times a lot healthier than hating it. Those who bask in their own company are the ones with significantly fewer worries than those who need to be around people to fill that void.

The loners, introverts and asocial people of the world are the ones spending their time creating and growing from themselves, rather than worrying about what everyone else is thinking.

They never worry about how they come off

People who like to be alone are more secure than those who are so good at showing face. They are the ones who are never second guessing their actions or working on their appearance.

They don’t care what people think of them because they, themselves, are their harshest critics.


They never worry about what they just said

The only times people who like their alone time are going out is with people who deserve their shared time. They don’t spend it with people who will judge them or people they worry about taking what they said the wrong way.

They don’t spend hours lying in their beds thinking about what they said or didn’t say back there. They are confident around the people they choose to talk to.


They never worry about acting like they have something to prove

People who enjoy their own company are not the types to put on airs. They never have to act like they have something to prove because they never have anyone to prove anything to.

When you meet them, you will see they are completely themselves, because that’s who matters to them. If you don’t like them, that’s just one fewer person they need to worry about hanging out with.


They’re never worried about doing things they don’t want to do

They don’t sit in bed wishing they didn’t have to go to a party where they hate most of the people just so they won’t spend Saturday night stuck with their own thoughts.

They never replace alone time with empty interactions. Their solitude is never rationalized or bargained for by trivial moments with undeserving people.


They’re never worried about ending up alone

They don’t have that irrational fear of never finding someone. If anything, they fear they will never understand how to share their alone time.

They don’t date people just for the company or settle for unfulfilled love just so they won’t end up alone.


They never worry about finding something to say

Because they’re not constantly putting themselves around others, they’re not constantly searching for new topics and talking points.

They know who they are and what they like and they don’t have to pretend to be interested in things just to keep the conversation going.


They never worry about missing out on something

They never have fear of missing out because there’s no place they’d rather be than with themselves. They don’t find it a wasted evening when they don’t go out.

In fact, they see it as the opposite. In our hectic schedules, getting a night to ourselves is easier said than done.


They never worry about being single

They search for meaning in themselves and take pride in that relationship. They don’t need to feel validated by the significant others they’re supposed to have.

They make sure they are completely in love with themselves before they worry about finding someone else to love.


They never worry about needing time to think

They spend their alone time exploring all the unexamined spaces of their mind. They don’t go to parties or friends’ houses wishing they could just have a moment to think, alone.

They are constantly thinking and constantly wondering. They are never without moments to ponder those questions that need time.


They never worry about having to lie or exaggerate

Their lives are complete by themselves. They don’t have to name drop or worry about being cool enough around the people they’re with because they don’t care about impressing current company or making new acquaintances.

They aren’t about collecting friends or racking up phone numbers. They know who they are and there’s no need to exaggerate about that.

 

 

 

 

 

~via EliteDaily