LISA RENEE (Time Shift Blog): “Assessing Character Weakness”

“Generally the negative ego needs to feel it has approval from others, and Self Esteem is hinged upon other people’s opinions and judgments. This is very unhealthy and can be toxic for all involved. No person can lead themselves and purposefully direct their life if they are afraid of others judging them. If your self-worth falls into how others perceive you, it is important to change that perception immediately and unconditionally provide self-love and self-acceptance. Your basic human right is to be who you are, so let yourself be unapologetically real.”

~Lisa Renee

 

The first stage of effectively building Personal Integrity is to perform an accurate assessment of the areas in your character that were weakened when you met strong resistance. We are all tested by life circumstances when we are confronted with something challenging and the situation really knocked us over and we crumbled.

When our character is weak, we can be easily emotionally manipulated and controlled. However, these events are great opportunities to learn life lessons and serve to inform us of what we must strengthen inside ourselves. Recovering our core, being authentic and living in Personal Integrity is similar to the concept of inspecting a building for its structural integrity. Our spiritual house is made strong and filled with inner light, when we direct our focus and attention to developing inner and outer personal integrity. Without strong personal integrity, like a building without structural integrity, we physically collapse and morally decay, because we are unable to withstand the pressure of the forces that create impact upon our lives.

  • Are you able to maintain integrity while withstanding the pressure of enduring personal challenges or spiritual crisis?
  • How well do you cope with stress?
  • How well can you refocus back into relaxation and neutrality?

Track yourself in how well you do in crisis moments or challenges, observing if can you stay in your core and withstand the impact.

The Negative Ego destroys integrity period. Thus working towards clearing the inferior and superior vacillating thought forms of negative ego, is the key to restoring balance. Generally the negative ego needs to feel it has approval from others, and Self Esteem is hinged upon other people’s opinions and judgments. This is very unhealthy and can be toxic for all involved. No person can lead themselves and purposefully direct their life if they are afraid of others judging them. If your self-worth falls into how others perceive you, it is important to change that perception immediately and unconditionally provide self-love and self-acceptance. Your basic human right is to be who you are, so let yourself be unapologetically real.

Be aware when you are hiding things or sweeping them under the rug from fear, like buried secrets, or asking people to keep secrets. This also feeds the Roots of Dishonesty and Triangulation. Upon getting more comfortable with being transparent and honest, it evolves over time and becomes more important that you tend to not hide things from others, as you may be hiding from the truth that needs to be surfaced. Truth is truth, and it stands through the test of time. Maintaining appropriate boundaries is important, yet at the same time in finding balance with living more transparently, stop judging yourself and others, and make the effort to build a stronger character with personal integrity. Personal Integrity gives you the inner strength to tell it like it is, there is no need to hide anything, when it is what it is. Truth is truth, when it’s expressed honestly and authentically.

How many times in social situations do you compromise your values or go along with something that feels bad? When we compromise ourselves too much and bend to other peoples will, this is not healthy for us and erodes integrity. When we commit to be of service to others it does not mean we repeatedly compromise our values, beliefs or integrity to do what the other person wants us to do. To be effective with managing our personal energies, we must be responsible for directing our energies, time and effort into the things that feel meaningful for us and reflect our personal values. This is important not only for building personal integrity, but in developing the self-leadership skills required to claim Self-Ownership.

Erosion of Integrity

The 3D Mind Control set up is purposed to intentionally destroy the Coherence and stability within sets of normative values that both define and model standards of behavior throughout human civilization. Through the mass promotion of the anti-human value systems, it destroys integrity and trust within the fabric of society, and directly erodes the development of Personal Integrity.

By consistently using Dehumanization tactics to invalidate the vital need for creating truly functioning and equitable humanitarian based value systems throughout society, this anti-human agenda successfully erodes the majority of an individual’s Personal Integrity. The psychopathic Corporatocracy running global society tells us that wealth and power are made King of the Throne, sitting in absolute power over any matter that is governed by Rule of Law. Human slavery is essentially made meaningless to our societal value system when there is no meaning or value given to life. As a result the tyrants stay in power and gross profits continue to be made on human misery.

The Controller Pillars of Society demonstrate recurrent victimization of those individuals that speak transparently and truthfully to the public, in order to condition persecution of any coherent value system that is deeply connected to maintaining one’s personal integrity. The Controllers do not want to produce people with genuine Personal Integrity that follow a coherent value system that promotes strong Self Esteem and self-responsibility, a person that lives by what they believe in and won’t compromise their integrity.

The psychological warfare approach of divide and conquer tactics used by the NAA to condition anti-human values and erode integrity in the masses is called the Archontic Deception Strategy. The Archontic Deception Strategy is used to socially engineer the death culture, a culture of fear, dishonesty and deception. This is achieved through Pavlovian mind control conditioning that adopts extremely self-destructive behaviors as the standard model to guide human behavior. Through conditioning these same behaviors repeatedly in mass media to manufacture Social Norms, it has produced a population of people that commonly display these negative ego qualities of fear, dishonesty and deception as an acceptable value system that guides their deepest motivations and interactions. People without a value system of personal integrity are easily corrupted and manipulated by mass mind control, producing unstable, erratic and destructive behaviors.

(Source: ES News – Personal Integrity)

 

~via EnergeticSynthesis.com – Time Shift Blog – posted June 25, 2019

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LISA RENEE (Time Shift Blog): “Embodying Integrity”

“The world is rapidly changing during these stages of bifurcation, in which the Negative Polarity and Positive Polarity spirals are becoming more extreme and amplified in the external. In order to stay deeply connected into our core self, and to withstand the massive impact of these opposing forces colliding, we must take conscious steps now to embody personal integrity.”

~Lisa Renee

 

Personal Integrity is the quality of being truthful and honest with yourself and others, of intentionally aligning personal behaviors and actions to be congruently aligned with your own Personal Value System, moral principles, and ethics. It generally requires personal choice and commitment to align ourselves to stay consistent with personal values and ethical standards, so that when we speak we mean what we say.

Developing Personal Integrity is essential to becoming a stable, clear and trustworthy person that aligns their decisions in life with their chosen personal values. It is the milestone of building a strong character guided by one’s chosen personal values, and is reflected in a person that is firmly centered in purpose and directed in life by their own core self. We compromise our core integrity whenever we let others make poor decisions for us or when we betray a trust, betray our personal values, or betray that which we know is the truth for ourselves. When we compromise our Personal Integrity, we allow a back door vulnerability for dark force manipulation that many times descends even more darkness and chaos into the situation where we had made the compromise. To support the embodiment of our true essential nature, achieve single soul occupancy and continual consciousness expansion, it is imperative that we understand how to generate and maintain Personal Integrity.

Self-Inquiry upon Personal Integrity

To build and maintain personal integrity takes some effort and commitment, like developing the self-awareness that is required to define your personal values so that you can measure your behaviors and actions, in order to evaluate how aligned you are to your authentic self. When you consciously participate to clarify personal beliefs and core values, the next step is to honestly assess how well you are doing, by reviewing yourself in a personal integrity report. It may be a powerfully positive process to review your core values and generate personal integrity reports annually, so that you can see how you are evolving and transforming, as you better stay aligned to your own personal value system. This begins to develop more competency in self-leadership and life management skills, so that you are empowered to make positive differences from the values that you lead in your life. Real self-leadership and Self-Ownership begins when we have absolute clarity within the context of our personal beliefs and core values, which become the guiding principles we follow in our lives.

What are the most important Personal Values that motivate my life?  

Choose up to five of the most important core values that feel the most essential to live authentically and express your highest purpose. Then focus upon those themes that you have chosen and evaluate if you are practicing and increasing these important values throughout your life. In the Guardian context for reclamation of Christ, our personal core value system would be directly connected to the Law of One practices. For example, for those dedicated to be of service to the Law of One, some of our most important personal core values are:

  • Expressing Unity Consciousness, knowing we are all interconnected.
  • Expressing Unconditional Love and Compassion to Myself, Love Others and Love Earth.
  • Expressing Service to Others orientation to motivate personal actions.

Maybe upon deeper reflection or in the future you’ll find that your most important personal values are shifting, or are revealing differently in order to become more specific in their quality. The more specific we are in identifying our core values, the more accurate and clear we can be when applying those to the behaviors that guide our life. As an example, let’s say through deeper self-study you have identified a recurring pattern that makes it hard to feel confident in valuing yourself when in the company of intimidating people. One of the core values that you choose is to Value Yourself equally to others, no matter what happens. To make this an important guideline in your life will help strengthen personal behavior to value yourself while in intimidating situations, which increases Personal Integrity.

Once you’ve defined some of your most important personal values, then inquire on each one to evaluate how you can better align your thoughts and behaviors with the meaning of each value. For example, ask three questions about the core values of expressing Unity, to help you accurately assess positive changes that you can make to be more authentic and within integrity.

  • What does Unity mean to me, how do I express Unity in my thoughts, behaviors and actions?
  • How can I better practice Unity consciousness throughout my life?
  • Am I practicing empathy with others to more deeply express Unity?

Am I living in Personal Integrity and what areas can I improve?

As you meditate and reflect on your life over the past year, assess if you have been authentic to your core values and the ways that you can improve your actions, to reflect integrity and authenticity in the future. In each area when reflecting upon personal values, inquire on what is aligned to your authentic self, those things that feel they are functioning well. Then place your attention upon the personal lessons and opportunities that you have to greatly increase inner strength, the core strength you will need in order to act authentically and within personal integrity.

Summarize the key points in your Personal Integrity Assessment for reference.

As you gain clarity on identifying important personal values and how you can build and maintain authentic integrity, prepare a summary of key points that you can revisit for inspiration to help guide your life direction and purpose in the next cycle. Print out your notes to clarify in more detail your personal vision for living within core personal values, knowing that when you are maintaining personal integrity it naturally aligns to fulfill your highest purpose. Embodying core personal values, living, thinking and breathing those values is what expresses Personal Integrity. This is the key to avoid negative cause and effect or miasmatic imprints upon what you are manifesting. Then make an effort to re-read and reflect upon your Personal Integrity Assessment regularly, to keep you focused on what personal core values are the most important guiding principles of fulfilling your most authentic expression.

Practical Application of Embodying Integrity

In the process of completing a personal integrity self-assessment and consciously choosing your value system based on what you know to be true for you, now is the time to take conscious steps every day to behave in ways that are consistent with your personal values.

  • Identify the behavioral traits that need to be addressed and are required to change.
  • Determine the underlying reasons why you have not behaved with greater personal integrity.
  • Observe the obstacles and other people that are used as excuses to lie or violate your personal values or moral code.
  • Commit to build authentic relationships through greater truthfulness, honesty and being open and direct.
  • Compile a list of tasks and behaviors in which you dedicate to become more trustworthy and honest.
  • Protect your basic human rights to be authentic and protect the rights of others, by respecting the decisions and opinions of other people.
  • When possible, be of service to others and live as an example for embodying truthfulness and integrity.
  • Be willing to honestly self-assess progress on your commitment to personal integrity, making adjustments along the way.
  • Look for the support of others who are inspiring examples of personal integrity, and have similar goals and personal values to be honest and trustworthy.
  • Develop Accountability for personal behaviors and actions, and if you make a mistake that impacts others or you break a promise, be willing to admit it and apologize.

The world is rapidly changing during these stages of bifurcation, in which the Negative Polarity and Positive Polarity spirals are becoming more extreme and amplified in the external. In order to stay deeply connected into our core self, and to withstand the massive impact of these opposing forces colliding, we must take conscious steps now to embody personal integrity.

 

(Source: ES Newsletter – Personal Integrity)

 

~via EnergeticSynthesis.com – Time Shift Blog – December 18, 2018

MATEO SOL: “11 Traps That Sabotage Spiritual Growth”

“No matter what the practice or teaching, ego loves to wait in ambush to appropriate spirituality for its own survival and gain.”

~Chögyam Trungpa, Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism

 

Spiritual growth is an experience we all go through once we have experienced the spiritual awakening process. As we begin to awaken to the truth of who we are, we develop a connection to our authentic essence, higher nature or Soul.

As we progressively advance on our paths, our spiritual essence begins to blossom like a luminous flower deep in our heart. And the more we clear away the dead, gnarled and overgrown beliefs, perspectives, and emotional baggage within us, the more clearly we feel our divine essence. When we maintain our inner garden, we feel more and more love, wisdom, peace, and wholeness as our True Nature is revealed slowly to us.

Yet, like any garden, our metaphorical inner landscapes can be consumed by weeds, plagues, and forms of pollution that strangle anything beautiful we have been nurturing. Sometimes, we even sabotage the growth occurring within us ourselves, without knowing it.

What is Spiritual Growth?

 

“This isn’t a journey about becoming something.  This is about unbecoming who we are not.”

~Adyashanti, The End of Your World

 

Spiritual growth is the process of awakening to your true nature, purpose, and potential. When you undergo spiritual growth you experience an expansion in awareness and insight, also known as higher consciousness. All spiritual growth has one objective: to help you embody your Soul, Higher Self or Atman. Once you are able to unite with your Soul, you will experience what is understood as enlightenment, “heaven,” Oneness or moksha.

The problem with the spiritual journey is that it is often laden with traps of many kinds. These traps are not physical, but they are instead mental and are often referred to as anti-awakening forces.

As we process life primarily through the mind, we also tend to approach spirituality with the mind. The issue with this is that spirituality cannot be contained by the limitations of thought. Once spirituality is captured within a thought, it ceases to maintain its true essence and instead becomes a constricting belief or dogma. In other words, spirituality loses its alive, ever-flowing essence once it is compartmentalized within the mind.

Think about it this way: have you ever felt immense awe and wonder in the presence of something beautiful and enchanting like a sunrise? The moment you stop immersing yourself in the feeling of the sunrise, and start taking a photo of it or describing it in a text message, is the moment you are no longer truly present with the sunrise. Instead, you are filtering it through your thoughts or through a lens of some kind. The same can be said with spirituality.

The more we use the mind to approach our Soul, the further our Soul feels. But the moment we drop our thoughts and allow ourselves to purely feel our Soul, suddenly we feel at home once again. Think of it like this: when you chase the sun on the horizon thinking you will reach it, you never will, because it is an illusion. But when you stop and feel the sun’s presence shining on your skin already, you will no longer chase anything.

It is difficult for us, as mind-oriented beings, to become conscious of our thoughts, as we have been conditioned to identify with them since a young age. But once we can observe our thoughts and how they tend to sabotage our happiness, we will experience true spiritual growth.

11 Traps that Sabotage Spiritual Growth

Below I want to share with you eleven of the most common traps that we fall into on the spiritual path. I have personally experienced these pitfalls many times, and they have resulted in a lot of pain and struggle. See how many of these traps you can identify with:

1. The trap of spiritual bypassing

Spiritual bypassing is the practice of using spirituality to avoid, suppress or escape from certain emotions or situations in life. Common types of spiritual bypassing include:

  • numbing one’s emotions through “spiritualized” repression and avoidance
  • unhealthy obsession and attachment to the positive (e.g. positive thinking) and adopting a passive-aggressive “nice” mask
  • debilitating judgment about one’s negativity or shadow self
  • anger-phobia
  • weak personal boundaries
  • blind or excessively tolerant compassion (to the detriment of oneself and the other)
  • forcefully trying to “kill” the ego and condemning it as “bad/evil”
  • exaggerated detachment
  • getting stuck in theoretical spirituality and dogmatic beliefs about “truth”
  • denial of self-responsibility by placing it on another higher being (e.g. spirit guide, angel)
  • delusions of having arrived at a higher level of being
  • using spiritual practices to escape unpleasant emotions; for example,
  • using meditation to dissociate from emotions, rather than transmute them

2. The trap of superiority

This manifests as the tendency to “look down” upon others who are not as “consciously advanced” or “awakened.” The trap of superiority can be seen as a subtle feeling of “being better” than others who aren’t “spiritual.” In more extreme cases, this trap can appear as the tendency to lash out at people who are still “asleep,” “blind” or “sheep” of society. This kind of reactive behavior can often be seen in people who have just “woken up” to the state of the world, yet have undergone minimal spiritual growth. We need to remember that everyone is doing the best they can at their level of consciousness. When the time comes, they will awaken too.

3. The trap of forcefully trying to wake others up

Once we have awoken out of the “matrix” it is common for us to desperately want our loved ones and fellow peers to awaken. We can see how much pain and delusion other people are in, and that riles up in us the intense desire to “show them the truth.” However, often our attempt to forcefully awaken people misfires quickly. Even though we have good intentions, our desire to “save” others causes them to backlash in ways that infuriate both them and us. The less responsive they are to our pushy attempts to “wake them up,” the more frustrated and alienated we become. Eventually, trying to force others to wake up ends up harming both ourselves and others. Not only that, but this trap generates a lot of anger and misunderstanding, which results in further ego ensnarement, sabotaging our spiritual growth. Let people wake up when they are ready.

4. The trap of wanting to help others

This trap is closely entwined with the previous trap except it is more geared towards giving others advice. There is nothing wrong with wanting to help others, as long as you respect their boundaries. But sometimes developing an expanded spiritual perspective gives the ego an opportunity to feel more “knowledgeable” than others still trapped in illusion. When unsolicited advice is given to others, the results can be disastrous (think anger, upset, offense etc.).

Wanting to help others can also be used as a way of escaping our need to help ourselves. Under the guise of being “spiritual” and compassionate, helping others can be just another form of spiritual bypassing.

5. The trap of wanting to revolutionize the world

Once we wake up to the lies and corruption present in our current societal structure, many of us want to desperately change society. We fall into the trap of thinking that freedom, honesty, and justice can be created by changing the external system. As a result, we buy into the “us versus them” and “divide and conquer” mentality that is a product of the ego’s tunnel vision. We don’t realize that we’re actually fuelling the corrupt system which depends on anger and chaos to thrive and survive. Instead of understanding that all true change comes from an internal revolution, we get caught up in the pursuit of external revolution which is fragile and transient.

6. The trap of meaninglessness

Once we experience divine and transcendent states of being in which we become One with all, we can fall into the trap of spiritual nihilism after the experience passes. In other words, once we realize, from the perspective of the Universe, that nothing we do ultimately matters because all is passing, we can fall into a depressive mindset. Using truths such as “All is an illusion,” the person who falls for this trap tends to filter life through the mind. By mentally clinging to these truths, they become beliefs that the ego uses as an excuse to paradoxically feel separate from existence.

7. The trap of avoiding everyday responsibilities

Some people get so infatuated with the spiritual path that they avoid dealing with ordinary, everyday affairs. This form of escapism can lead to leeching off others, not paying bills, evading taxes, obsessing with “living off the grid,” etc. When avoiding everyday responsibilities is worn as a badge of being consciously elevated or “more spiritual” this too is a form of egotism in disguise. Avoiding ordinary responsibilities which are not perceived as being “spiritual enough” can also be a form of distraction that the ego uses to limit spiritual growth. The more concerned and obsessed you are with living an outwardly “spiritual” looking life, the more distanced from your inner work you become. Sometimes we need to feed the sharks to keep the calm and live balanced lives.

Remember the old Zen saying: “Before Enlightenment: chop wood, carry water; after Enlightenment: chop wood, carry water.” We need to be humble and recognize that ordinary daily life is the perfect place to spiritually grow and mature.

8. The trap of self-victimization

Soon after we experience a spiritual awakening and wake up to the insanity of the world, it is common for us to get stuck in self-victimization. We may start to perceive the world as a “prison” and other people as the “captives” or even “capturers.” The shock of awakening may send us spiraling into anxiety and paranoia. Inevitably, we may start feeling like victims resulting in us blaming other people and the higher powers for how we feel. The spiritual trap of self-victimization can be seen a lot on social media which often tends to become a pity party for spiritual fledglings. At the end of the day, we need to see that it is actually our thoughts that cause us to suffer, not other people or situations. Once we can take self-responsibility for our perspectives and beliefs, we can become empowered once again.

9. The trap of the Savior Complex

This trap is related to the previously mentioned trap of wanting to help others. The Savior Complex is adopted by people who feel a sense of superiority to the rest of humanity. Their sense of being “different” and more “spiritually elevated” can make them feel as though they are destined to fix the world. The Savior Complex can most often be seen within the “lightworker/Starseed/healer” circles who tend to put themselves up on pedestals, believing it is their cosmic duty to “save the planet.” This perception aligns with the belief that there is something “wrong” with reality and that other people are “broken” and need to be fixed (which is an ego perspective). This perception also reinforces the ego’s sense of “specialness” and self-importance.

The Savior Complex can go one step further and evolve into a Martyr Complex. Martyrs believe they must “bear the burdens” of others. Obviously, this is an extremely unhealthy way of living which is based on Christian conditioning (think of the story of Jesus). By “carrying” other people’s pain, Martyrs bypass taking responsibility for their own happiness and enable other people’s immature behavior. Read more about the Martyr Complex.

10. The trap of attachment

After experiencing profound and expansive mystical experiences which often come after significant spiritual growth, it is common for us to attach to the experience. It can be painful to come down from these experiences and return back to usual, unenlightened reality. We can also attach to our “stories” and beliefs about spirituality. Because the mind tries to make sense of this transcendent experience, it will often latch onto various ideas as a form of control. But the more we attach to our beliefs, stories, desires, and mental interpretations, the more we suffer. We forget that everything passes, even transcendent experiences. Enlightenment isn’t a destination, it is a complete surrender; a fundamental shift in the way we approach life.

Attachment is perhaps the most common trap that sabotages our spiritual growth. On one hand, attachment to ideas helps us to grow, but ultimately, those ideas that we are unwilling to let go of end up stagnating our growth. When ideas become protection blankets rather than catalysts for our growth, there is a big problem. We need to realize that freedom cannot be experienced through the mind. Freedom is felt when we can be liberated from attachment to our thoughts.

11. The trap of relying on external answers

As we progress through our spiritual paths it is normal, and beneficial, for us to seek out external support. Reading books, attending workshops and seminars, going to retreats, practicing holistic techniques, and getting a personal guru all help us experience spiritual growth. However, after a while, it is common for us to become too dependent on external answers for our freedom and happiness. This pitfall can be seen in many spiritual seeker’s obsession and glorification of their gurus (in other words, projecting and disowning their divinity onto another).

Eventually, as we become accustomed to constantly searching outside of ourselves for answers, we forget the presence of our own Souls. We forget that our ultimate source of guidance and wisdom comes from within us, and instead, we keep chasing things outside of ourselves that we believe will “enlighten” us.

We need to stop, pause, and reflect on our spiritual journeys. Are we seeking out first-hand experience or second-hand experience given to us by others? Don’t forget to look within for your answers as well because it is by connecting with your Soul that you will ultimately experience freedom.

Final Thoughts

In order to see through and extricate ourselves from these traps, we need to be radically honest with ourselves. We need to be willing to see that we have indeed gone astray and have fed into the ego. We will also immensely benefit from exploring our Shadow Selves and exploring our mistaken beliefs.

Don’t worry if you have fallen into any of these traps. We all become ensnared by the ego. It can be particularly difficult for us to see clearly when the ego “spiritualizes” certain beliefs and ideas. The more open, humble, and honest you are, the more you will be able to see through these tricks and liberate yourself.

Finally, don’t be afraid of the dark. Don’t be afraid of being wrong. Everything, no matter how painful, is a learning opportunity. At the end of the day, your Soul is everything you have been searching for.

If you have any extra thoughts or insights about traps that sabotage spiritual growth, please share below. I would also love to hear your own journey.

 

~via WakeUp-World.com

ALETHEIA LUNA: “Being Spiritual Doesn’t Mean Sh*t If You Can’t Hold Space for Others”

“If we ever hope to grow at a deep level and feel authentically connected to others, we need to learn how to hold space for both ourselves and others.”

~Aletheia Luna

 

So, here’s the thing. We might do Instagram-perfect yoga. We might meditate for at least an hour a day. We might pray. Say mantras. Do mudras. Send love to the world. We might have a hoard of crystals and other spiritual trinkets. We might do elaborate daily rituals, eat a cruelty-free whole food diet, and fast every month. We might burn incense, smile all day, say affirmations, and say “love and light” or “namaste” a lot. We might call ourselves spiritual seekers, healers, empaths, intuitives, old souls, or yogis.

But in my humble opinion, all of this doesn’t mean sh*t if we can’t show compassion and be there for others.

The Hypocrisy of Saccharine Spirituality

Firstly, I want to start by saying that I am by no means innocent. I have judged others before, turned a blind eye, shown unkindness, and committed spiritual bypassing — all while under the self-designated label of being “spiritual.”

I think to some extent, we all have. That is why I feel that the topic of this article is so important to cover — hypocrisy is something that we’re all capable of. The tendency is latent within each and every one of us. And I think we all need to understand and work to be aware of that.

But there are some things in life that tend to trigger, bring out, and exacerbate this hypocrisy. In this case, I am referring to a certain popular variety of spirituality. I call it Saccharine Spirituality — and it is a type of spirituality that is defined by a sickly sweet emphasis on “good vibes only” and “love and light” without much depth or real-life rawness.

Saccharine spirituality is the type of spirituality out there that involves worshiping the “feel-good” and “high vibe,” but actively avoids, denies, or shuns anything negative and uncomfortable. Saccharine spirituality is all about feeling empowered, developing self-love, and celebrating forms of spirituality that look good on the surface — but at the same time, it produces a phobia of anything too real, too emotionally challenging, too blood-and-dirt, too “unawakened” or “low vibe.”

And it doesn’t take much to see that saccharine spirituality is alive and thriving more than ever. We can literally see it everywhere: on social media, in real life, and in all spiritual and religious spheres.

I first witnessed saccharine spirituality growing up in the Christian church I was raised in. I remember how the church abandoned, passively shunned, and ignored one of the women who had been attending the church for 20+ years. This woman’s husband had been prosecuted for child molestation and was going to prison. I was the only one who spoke to this gentle soul, despite the fact that we were all supposed to be “brothers and sisters in Christ.”

I now witness this type of abandonment and hypocrisy in the spiritual realm.

I hear and witness self-described sensitive “empaths” show an extraordinary lack of empathy and self-entitled judgment towards others.

I watch “old souls” tear each other apart like animals.

I see spiritual seekers ostracize and react harshly to any person who thinks critically.

I look on as “healers” rush to fix, ignore, predict, or diagnose the suffering of others.

I watch as “psychics/mystics/witches/yogis” (*insert spiritual label here*) love talking and posting about themselves, but ignore meeting others on a deep level.

I’m sorry. I don’t care if you’re a talented healer or psychic. I’m not interested in whether you’re a self-identified empath or spiritual seeker. I don’t want to hear about how much mystical power or intuitive prowess you have. Being spiritual doesn’t mean sh*t if you can’t hold space for people.

What Does Holding Space Mean?

Holding space is very simple. It means being completely present with another person. Holding space means giving another the opportunity to be completely heard, seen, and understood. I’m not talking about trying to fix, give advice to, or pathologize the other person — when I say holding space, I mean it in the most simple way possible: just being 100% there for the person, without trying to change or force advice onto them.

To witness another person and be completely receptive to what they have to share is scarcely practiced. How often have you felt deeply heard, seen, and understood by another? How often has someone sat down with you and genuinely asked: “Hey, share with me how you feel” and held space for all your joy or sorrow? If you’re like most people: pretty rarely.

It’s no wonder that most of us are so emotionally starved. It’s no wonder that most of us are so desperate to be seen.

In a world full of stress, incessant business, emotional isolation, and self-absorption, holding space for someone is the most precious gift you can give. That is why I say that being spiritual doesn’t mean shit without this one important practice. Who cares if you possess extrasensory gifts or can meditate for six hours straight? Who cares if you have deep self-knowledge or can enter alternate planes of consciousness at will?

If you can’t bring those skills into your life in a down-to-earth way, they mean nothing.

If you can’t practically apply them in the blood-and-grit of daily life, they mean nothing.

If you can’t connect or show kindness to others, they mean nothing.

If you can’t sit down with a person and ask “Hi. How are you really?” and actually listen wholeheartedly, don’t even bother.

In the end, if your brand of spirituality encourages self-absorption and a superficial feel-good denial of other’s pain, it’s a waste of time.

“Your pain, your sorrow, your doubts, your longings, your fearful thoughts: they are not mistakes, and they are not asking to be ‘healed.’ They are asking to be held.” ~Jeff Foster

 

How to Hold Space for People

Holding space is about giving space.

Too often we jump to the part where we want to fix, instruct, or heal the person — or even worse, hog the conversation, talk about ourselves, and “one-up” the other person’s pain. But the truth is, most people (including ourselves) are just looking for a person who will sit with them in all of their joy or misery, and BE.

Mindful presence is the core of what holding space means. In other words, holding space means that we simply sit with a person and give them our undivided attention in the spirit of kindness.

“Undivided attention!?” you may think, “I don’t have the energy to do that!” Don’t worry. I realize that holding space for others isn’t always possible. You’re not alone. If you’re anything like me, your energy reserves are very limited. So it’s unrealistic to expect ourselves to always hold space for others, especially when we are tired, stressed, or sick. In which case, don’t be a martyr. Take care of yourself. Have a break. Step away. Have a nap. Top up your energy reservoir.

But if you’re still struggling to hold space for others, there might be a deeper underlying issue that you need to work through.

For example, do you often feel yourself talking over or interrupting others? Do most of your conversations center around your issues, thoughts, and feelings? Do you feel uncomfortable when others get too emotional? Do you find deep topics of conversation unsettling? These are all signs that you aren’t holding space for yourself. In such a case… how can you hold space for others when you aren’t holding space for yourself?

If we ever hope to grow at a deep level and feel authentically connected to others, we need to learn how to hold space for both ourselves and others.

Here’s how to do that.

Holding space for ourselves and others:

1. Mindfully tune into yourself

How can you become receptive and open to others without doing the same for yourself? Tuning into your thoughts and feelings is a practice called mindfulness. It requires you to become curious about what is going on inside of you. And to do that, you’ll need to slow down and breathe a little. Ask yourself, “How am I feeling at the moment?” “What type of thoughts/stories are running through my head?” Also be attentive to your body and notice whatever sensation, ache, or pain you feel. Simply note how you feel and move on with your day. If you need help doing this, I highly recommend that you use an app I use called ‘Calm’ — it will motivate you to develop mindfulness as a skill.

2. Be transparent with yourself

Express how you feel in an authentic way. Allow yourself to be seen by yourself. To do this, find a notebook or journal that you can dedicate to your thoughts and feelings. Journaling every day about what is worrying or concerning you will create more clarity in your life. Not only that but when you make this therapeutic tool a habit, you will feel more emotionally balanced and capable of truly holding space for others.

3. Release pent-up emotions

Don’t allow your emotions to build up inside of you. Find healthy outlets to express them such as through artwork, intense exercise, catharsis, or simply having a good cry. When we are motivated to “help” others out of the need to relieve our own internal discomfort, we’re not being kind. We’re not being empathetic. We’re just not. Instead, we are using others as a way to feel better about ourselves. Finding a safe form of catharsis will allow you to be calm and centered enough to show compassionate attentiveness to yourself and others.

4. Learn to listen more than talk

Master the art of listening. If you are a person who is used to chattering away, experiment with being quiet and allowing others to talk. How do you feel when you don’t talk so much? You might feel a sense of relief, or alternatively, you might feel unseen or ignored. Journal about these feelings. If you feel uncomfortable with allowing others to speak more than you, ask yourself “why?” In what ways are you depending on others to be seen and understood, rather than yourself? Practicing active listening involves making eye contact, letting others speak uninterrupted, indicating that you understand what the person is saying, and listening without judgment.

5. Let your mind be like water

Listen to other people without forming responses in your mind. How often has someone shared something interesting, and you miss the rest of what they say because you’re too busy constructing a clever/insightful reply? It’s tempting to fill the spaces in conversations with thoughts. After all, our minds think around 800 words per minute, compared to 125-150 words we speak per minute. But experiment with listening wholeheartedly to what a person says. If thoughts come into your mind, gently refocus your mind on what the person is saying. Then, after the person has stopped talking, give yourself a few seconds to gather thoughts, then respond. I promise that your response will be much more engaging and interesting to the other person because you have gathered all the nuances and details (instead of prematurely forming a response).

6. Let compassion guide you

The purpose of holding space for another isn’t to be a saint. It isn’t to be a martyr. It is to be entertained or to get karmic brownie points. To hold space for a person is an act of compassion, an expression of love for another human being. It not only makes you feel good, but it also makes the other person feel seen, heard, and understood. What could be more precious than that?

7. Practice with a friend or family member

An easy way to practice holding space is to schedule time every week with someone close to you, and to exchange mindful presence with each other. Notice how it feels to be completely received by another person. Imagine giving that to others on a regular basis!

8. Know your limits and take self-responsibility

Are you tired, cranky, overwhelmed, or otherwise incapable of holding space for another? Relax. It’s normal and 100% fine to feel that way. But make sure that you take responsibility for how you feel.

Final Thoughts

Holding space for others doesn’t mean that you have to be a pushover, doormat, or unnecessarily submissive person. Sometimes you will need to hold space for yourself more than others. Sometimes you will enter long periods of life where you are incapable of being present with others. That is normal. Not all of us can be Eckhart Tolle 24/7. So do the compassionate thing and draw a line. Learn to say a gentle no to others and be OK with it. If someone is becoming overly clingy or needy, be assertive, draw clear boundaries, and step away in a firm but caring manner. It is OK to be selective about who you hold space for, particularly if you dislike the person and struggle to stay present with them. (Hey, we’re all human!)

You might also be short on time, but still wish to hold space for another. In this case, explain to the other that you only have a couple of minutes to spare, or set another date and time to catch up.

Remember, holding space needs to come out of a place of compassion and the desire to help others be seen, heard, and understood. If you are doing it out of obligation, pressure, or duty, take a step back. Change course. Do something else.

The most important ingredient for holding space for another is the ability to hold space for yourself. By genuinely taking the time to wholeheartedly listen to your inner thoughts and feelings, you will be better equipped to show the same to others.

Spirituality is not just about learning to love ourselves. It is also about learning to extend that love and care to others in a down-to-earth way. One of the best and easiest ways to do that is by simply listening to others. You don’t need to always give them pep talks. You don’t need to always rush to prescribe a solution to their problems. Often, what people need the most is just a person who is receptive enough to simply listen without judgment.

To be completely seen, heard, and understood in the presence of another living soul is one of the most healing forces in the world. I hope you take the time to share this gift with others.

 

~via LonerWolf.com

ALEXANDER PAPAGEORGHIOU: “Accountability — The Death of The Victim”

When we speak of Awakening, Ascending, and becoming Creators, we often address this as a change in our energies and who we are, a proposed new vs the old.  This is not really accurate.  At the present time, we are becoming what we have been all these lifetimes, ever since we descended into physicality and Karma.

Yet, to create now we need to look at our own role in the past and what experiences have brought us here.  A lot of people ascending have a great difficulty accepting and taking responsibility for the choices their souls have made over the lifetimes that have led to the diverse, and often painful experiences, they often resort to blaming others for.  This brings us to Accountability.

If we look through a 5D lens at the world today, we can see that all we hold in relatively high esteem, like our social construct, governments, institutions, gender roles, and so much more, often evade any kind of accountability for their mistakes, and flow by unapologetically and unaware of the harm that is already done.  We are all part of the human experiment and mistakes are totally acceptable.  Nobody is without fault, ever.  The difference is if one is willing to accept that they have been wrong, be held accountable and accept a different path needs to be taken the next time around.  If we look at our leaders, from the community outwards, often there are mistakes made, and hurtful consequences result from this, but a wall of fake legitimacy is put up so as not to deal with these.  This is the 3D Male EGO at work.  The same ego can make no mistake because admitting to such would be a sign of weakness and that is not a reality people want to see, or so they believe, and therefore the veils go up again and again.   This is most probably one of the most pressing issues of our times.  Lately, since the last months of 2017, we see this patterns of accountability and those who have evaded it in our faces constantly, as the game is up.  In our own lives and hearts, we need to have the same conversation with our egos.

Before we came around for this lifetime, our soul chose a set of events and lessons that would help us evolve towards balance.  For many of these years we have been victims, blaming the world around us for our pain and anguish.  The fact we need to swallow and make peace with, is that, even through that pain, we were the CREATORS, not the victims, we chose this to learn and flourish, and we ended that cycle by waking up and progressing towards the current moment.  Our Creation, though inadvertently, began eons ago.  This cycle we become conscious of this.  This is the most liberating aspect of our lives if we look it straight in the eyes.

We are not victims and we have never been. We chose these lessons, we went through them, and here we are.  The more we accept our symbiotic relationship with our soul and the partnership we have, and the role we have had in choosing these experiences, we can stop blaming society, employers, family, lovers, and the world over for all the pain we feel.  There is no doubt that the 3D density has been grueling and trying on most of us and our bodies, minds and spirits have often flared, but here we are.  We are awake/ning and we MUST accept our role as creators, of our past mishaps, unconsciously, and our path to changing this energy, this time consciously.  This is the first step to liberation from 3D, the total acceptance of all we have had to face and its subsequent release, replacing that with the faith we have in the UNIVERSE, the SOURCE, and ourselves as CREATORS.

We are here now, so it is time to take the last layers off and no longer see victims in the mirror.  There is too much love around flowing through everything we once knew as reality to blame everyone else for our misfortune.  You will only create, if, and when, you are ready to release this, and accept that whatever position you are in, you are there because you know exactly how to get out of it.  Liberate yourself now, and look at the face staring back you from the mirror.  You won’t recognize it anymore.  The first step to the new you is your willingness to CHANGE.

Much Love,

Alexander

 

 

~via IndigoLightLove.com