LISA RENEE: “Narcissism”

 

“The NAA can be best understood as a Psychopathic or Sociopathic personality or identity profile with a Lack of Empathy that has no feelings of remorse. Narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or may as well not exist at all. Very little of what they say actually checks out in terms of facts or reality, but they’re extremely skillful at making the things they say sound believable, even if they’re just making them up out of thin air. Sociopathic people are masters at weaving elaborate fictional explanations to justify their actions. When caught red-handed, they respond with anger and threats, then weave new fabrications to explain away whatever they were caught doing. It is very common for people that base their leadership or authority on controlling behaviors and tyrannical principles, to aggressively manipulate others by creating a façade of charisma from mimicking what they have found people want to hear from their wounded ego parts. Many people do not want to hear or know the truth; they want to be lulled to sleep by fantasy delusions.”

~Lisa Renee

 

The conceit of egotism describes a person who acts to gain value for self serving motivation and taking in an excessive amount of resources than that which he or she gives back to others. Usually these are actions of taking in others energy, time and resources and is accompanied with very low ethical standards and displaying low moral character traits. This is also called consumptive modeling or energetic vampirism. Egotism may be fulfilled by exploiting the sympathy, trauma, emotion or ignorance of others, as well as utilizing coercive force, deception, manipulation, Mind Control and fraud. The egotist has an overwhelming sense of the centrality of the ‘Me’ operating in their personal qualities and personal identity. Without developing Self Awareness and ego discipline, the untamed Negative Ego is exploited by Mind Control and further develops itself into serious spiritual pathologies which lead to narcissism and Psychopathy.

Narcissism – The Secondary Stages of Negative Ego

Narcissism is used to describe the pursuit of gratification from vanity, or egotistic admiration of one’s own physical or mental attributes, that derive from arrogant pride.

The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism:

Shamelessness: Shame is the feeling that lurks beneath all unhealthy narcissism and the inability to process shame in healthy ways.

Magical thinking: Narcissists see themselves as perfect, using distortion and illusion known as magical thinking. They also use projection to dump shame onto others.

Arrogance: A narcissist who is feeling deflated may reinflate by diminishing, debasing, or degrading somebody else.

Envy: A narcissist may secure a sense of superiority in the face of another person’s ability by using contempt to minimize the other person.

Entitlement: Narcissists hold unreasonable expectations of particularly favorable treatment and automatic compliance because they consider themselves special. Failure to comply is considered an attack on their superiority, and the perpetrator is considered an “awkward” or “difficult” person. Defiance of their will is a narcissistic injury that can trigger narcissistic rage.

Exploitation: Can take many forms but always involves the exploitation of others without regard for their feelings or interests. Often the other is in a subservient position where resistance would be difficult or even impossible. Sometimes the subservience is not so much real as assumed.

Bad boundaries: Narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or may as well not exist at all. Those who provide narcissistic supply to the narcissist are treated as if they are part of the narcissist and are expected to live up to those expectations. In the mind of a narcissist there is no boundary between self and other. [1]

Untrustworthy Ego Profiles

We can apply this checklist to ourselves to inquire what may trigger our own Negative Ego to rear up from unhealed pain. Or we may apply the checklist for better discernment when making choices of where we place our trust and what we value as a model of strengthening our character. If we observe a person acting out an excessive amount of these behaviors near to us, we may choose to not support them in their delusions.

As is made clear here in these checklists, the more severe the negative ego dysfunction the more potentially disconnected the person is from their heart, intuition, self-awareness and spiritual source. This immediately gives one a gauge to measure what level a person can be trusted, no matter what words they may be speaking. In the severe stages of Narcissism and Psychopathy, the veneer of seduction, charisma and “mimicry” of empathic reactions that are geared for manipulation to serve one’s egocentric needs, and can be seen much more clearly over time. It is very common for people that base their leadership or authority on controlling behaviors and tyrannical principles, to aggressively manipulate others by creating a façade of charisma from mimicking what they have found people want to hear from their wounded ego parts. Many people do not want to hear or know the truth; they want to be lulled to sleep by fantasy delusions.

This is the tough part. We have to ask if we are able to seek the honest factual truth of behavioral interactions or have people feed us lies that are flattering or comfortable for our wounded ego parts. [2]

Lack of Empathy

The NAA can be best understood as a Psychopathic or Sociopathic personality or identity profile with a Lack of Empathy that has no feelings of remorse.

Narcissistic Personalities and Psychopaths have little to no remorse for the harm, destruction or killing they cause any person place or thing. This is described as a Lack of Empathy, which is characterized by the inability to feel, experience emotional states, or discern what another life form may be feeling. Lack of Empathy is a mutation in the DNA of a species that has been disconnected from its Soul-Spirit, and thus suffers from genetic damage and Soul Fragmentation.

Sociopath

Sociopaths are masters at influence and deception. Very little of what they say actually checks out in terms of facts or reality, but they’re extremely skillful at making the things they say sound believable, even if they’re just making them up out of thin air. Sociopathic people are masters at weaving elaborate fictional explanations to justify their actions. When caught red-handed, they respond with anger and threats, then weave new fabrications to explain away whatever they were caught doing.

Profile of Narcissism

Four dimensions of narcissism as a personality variable have been delineated: leadership/authority, superiority/arrogance, self-absorption/self-admiration, and exploitativeness/entitlement. [3]

 

References:

  1. Narcissism
  2. Untrustworthy Ego Profiles
  3. Narcissism

See Also:

Narcissistic Rage

Narcissistic Wound

 

~via Ascension Glossary

LISA RENEE: “All or Nothing Thinking”

“All-or-nothing thinking refers to thinking in extremes. You are either a success or a failure. Something is right or it’s wrong. In order to overcome all-or-nothing thinking, it is important to avoid thinking in negative, absolute terms. Most often the narcissist does this as an attempt to stabilize their sense of self positivity in order to preserve their Self Esteem, by perceiving themselves as purely upright or admirable and others who do not conform to their will or values as purely wicked or contemptible.”

~Lisa Renee

 

Cognitive Distortions are exaggerated, obsessive or irrational thought patterns that are believed to perpetuate the effects of psychopathological states, especially depression and anxiety. When we over-rely on cognitive distortions, we usually interpret events in such a way that fuels emotions such as anxiety, depression, or anger. All-or-nothing thinking is one such distortion. All-or-nothing thinking refers to thinking in extremes. You are either a success or a failure. Something is right or it’s wrong. These are examples of all-or-nothing thinking (also known as black-and-white thinking). Thoughts and beliefs that are grounded in pessimism can negatively impact your feelings, emotions, and mental health.

In order to overcome all-or-nothing thinking, it is important to avoid thinking in negative, absolute terms. Learning how to clear Negative Ego through refocusing thoughts is suggested to help relieve Mental Anxiety and stress related to negative emotions exacerbated by negative thoughts.

Splitting

(All-or-nothing thinking or dichotomous reasoning):

  • Evaluating the self, as well as events in life in extreme terms.
  • It’s either all good or all bad, either black or white, nothing in between.
  • Causing every small imperfection to seem incredibly dangerous and painful.
  • Splitting involves using terms like “always”, “every” or “never” when this is neither true nor equivalent to the truth. Example: When an admired person makes a minor mistake, the admiration is turned into contempt. [1]

Narcissistic Personality Disorder

People matching the diagnostic criteria for narcissistic personality disorder also use splitting as a central Ego Defense Mechanism. Most often the narcissist does this as an attempt to stabilize their sense of self positivity in order to preserve their Self Esteem, by perceiving themselves as purely upright or admirable and others who do not conform to their will or values as purely wicked or contemptible. Given the narcissist’s perverse sense of entitlement and Splitting, he or she can be equally geared, psychologically and practically, towards the promotion of projects, simultaneously promoting the demise of a certain collectively beneficial project.

The cognitive habit of splitting also implies the use of other related Ego Defense Mechanisms, namely idealization and devaluation, which are preventative attitudes or reactions to Narcissistic Rage and narcissistic injury.

 

See Also:

Negative Ego

Ego Defense Mechanism

Splitting

 

~via Ascension Glossary

JEAN M. TWENGE, PhD: “Is Donald Trump Actually Insecure Underneath?”

I’m often asked how you can spot a narcissist. Here’s my standard list:

  • Brag or show off
  • Name-dropping
  • Name brands or flashy possessions
  • Look at themselves in the mirror a lot
  • Turn the conversation back to him/herself
  • Insults others
  • Declarations about being the “best” or “great” without details
  • Emphasizes his/her status

I wrote that list two years ago — long before Donald Trump started running for president. Yet it could have been written just for him. As others have pointed out, the Donald is a textbook case of narcissistic personality. He is clearly functioning well and thus can’t be classified as having narcissistic personality disorder, the clinical-level form, which by definition only describes someone whose traits are causing them difficulty. Trump, instead, displays narcissism as a personality trait — the type we focus on in The Narcissism Epidemic.

Here’s the question: Is Trump’s narcissism a cover for insecurity? This is known as the “mask model” — the idea that grandiose narcissism is a show to distract people from the deep psychic pain underneath. A recent piece in Time made this claim, arguing that Trump is trying to cover for a “profound insecurity and lack of self-esteem.”

Here’s the problem: At least for grandiose narcissism like Trump’s, there’s no evidence that the mask model is true. Narcissists have high self-esteem on average, not low, and the most aggressive people are those with both high narcissism and high self-esteem. Children who become narcissistic are not those shamed by their parents, but those told they are special.

Perhaps the best evidence comes from studies measuring self-esteem in a subtle way, such as with an implicit self-esteem measure recording people’s reaction time in pairing words like “I” and “me” with words like “bad” and “good.” People who score high on grandiose narcissism also score high on implicit self-esteem. In other words, deep down inside, narcissists think they are awesome.

This is also just plain common sense: Does Trump really seem like he is insecure underneath? Does he seem to be in a state of psychic pain, or even covering for one? No — he’s having the time of his life. So why does he seem to crave all of the attention and adulation? The Time article argues that Trump is trying to fill a deep “psychic hole.”

I have a more straightforward explanation: He likes all of the attention because he thinks he deserves it. It’s never enough not because of psychic pain, but because he thinks everyone should pay attention to him. Attention is fun and gratifying; it has nothing to do with insecurity.

Why the Mask Model of Narcissism Is Dangerous

I will go further: I think it’s dangerous to believe that narcissists are insecure underneath. Not only is it not supported by empirical evidence, but it promotes the idea that the way to deal with narcissists is to boost their self-esteem and heal their “wounds” through more love and affection. This is like suggesting that the way to cure obesity is by giving everyone more doughnuts. The narcissistic person who ruins relationships through his self-centeredness does not need more love or attention — he needs to get kicked to the curb. The young adult who takes advantage of everyone around her does not need her self-esteem boosted — she needs to learn responsibility.

Narcissism is known as the “disease that hurts other people,” and the cure for it is real life — losing a relationship because of selfishness, losing a job because you’ve alienated people. Yes, we should try to understand narcissists and realize that their behavior is explained by this personality trait. But that does not mean we should believe that they are actually insecure — that myth undermines our understanding of narcissism because it presumes that it’s only skin-deep.

Many, many people have been hurt in relationships with narcissists by believing that they can change the person with more love. If only that were true — but sadly, most of the time, it’s not. We can have empathy for people with narcissistic traits, but that does not mean we have to believe they are suffering underneath. Most of the time, they are making other people suffer. They won’t suffer themselves until bad things start happening to them, often as a consequence of their narcissism. It is sad, but it is not due to insecurity.

Trump is not insecure. We should not be looking for the source of his “psychic pain” or expect that someday he will break down and show his true, doubting self. He really does think that he’s that great, and that his ideas are that great. If we believe otherwise — about him or anyone else with these traits — we risk underestimating the true power of the narcissist.

 

~via PsychologyToday.com