DERIC LEWIS: “3 Signs You Have A Strong Personality That Might Scare Some People”

Have you ever encountered someone with a powerful, independent personality? Did you feel like it was off putting, like the person might be hard to like? Chances are you simply didn’t understand the kind of person you were interacting with. Often times, these types of people can come off as aggressive, rude, overly opinionated or just plain bitchy. Chances are it feels like they are trying to dominate you, or make you feel insignificant. In actuality, nothing could be further from the truth. .

Dominant, aggressive, rude, arrogant. These descriptors actually do not typify a person with a powerful, independent personality at all. In fact, strong people are often some of the biggest teddy bears, and emotionally available people you will ever have the chance to meet once you make a genuine effort to get to know them. It’s just that people with strong personalities tend to give the meeker, more mild of us a bad rap.

Those people with strong personalities do not have to win, nor do they want to necessarily. It’s not about being better than anyone else. They typically just are not willing to let other people walk all over them, or put up with being used and abused.

Sure, sometimes strong people might be intimidating to you. But that is only as a result of you noticing their outward manifestation of their inner self confidence, and lack of need to seek validation from their peers. Do you have a powerful personality? Here are eight signs that you have a strong personality that might scare some people.

You Are Cautious, Maybe Even Picky About Who You Let Into Your Life

As a person with a strong personality, you do not rely on other people to define who you are, or what you are capable of. You recognize that some people need to put others down to make themselves feel better. Here’s the thing about being picky: it forces you to have high self-esteem and you build a great connection with your own self: you build your own voice of what you want and what works for you. Its not that you don’t necessarily get along with people, its just that you know exactly what you want in your relationships and social exchanges, and you aren’t willing to settle for less.

Even if you are still trying to discover your own identity, you know that you do not need a significant other, boss, best friend or family member to tell you what you’re capable of, or how to accomplish your goals.

You Can’t Stand Trivial Conversations

Conversations about the weather, and trivialities are often unbearable, and uncomfortable. If you have a powerful personality, you probably spend a lot of time thinking deeply, and have a lot of ideas to share. You do not want to waste time talking about things that in the long run don’t really matter all that much, when you could be spending your energy changing the world.

You might feel like you are bad at small talk. But that is not true. Anyone can make small talk. You are simply uncomfortable with meaningless pleasantries. Unfortunately, our culture has deemed small talk a social necessity. Wikipedia even goes so far as to describe it as a “social lubricant”, which makes it sound a whole lot more fun than it actually is. Small talk is meant to be light and fun. It flees from depth and meaning. Personal questions are considered inappropriate. Likewise, any emotion besides happy or neutral is discouraged. Consequently, authenticity dies on the vine. The truth is that small talk allows two people to have an entire conversation without really getting to know each other. Instead of being light and fun, the conversation is flat and boring. It is like a game of chess where both players always know each other’s next move. It is a predictable exchange, with predictable results. For people with a powerful personality, it is one of those annoying hurdles we must cross to get to the good stuff.

You Are Irked by Insensitivity, Idiocy or Willful Ignorance

Strong personalities are the result of being thoughtful and well-informed, as well as being confident in their mental prowess.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LAUREN MARTIN: “Simple Life: 10 Things People Who Love Being Alone Never Worry About”

I’m a recluse as much as the next guy… At least, that’s what I thought.

After a recent move to a city that welcomed one too many nights out and one too many clubs to name, I came to the harsh realization that my aversion to nights out and the company of others was not normal and I was coming off as, well, rude.

I thought there was nothing wrong with choosing to spend Friday night in the company of myself and my empty apartment.

I thought it was okay to enjoy walking alone more than with a friend. I thought it was healthy to relish in all those moments of solitude.

To people trying to be my friend, or at least use me as a pawn in their game of nights out, I was the antithesis of everything they wanted.

I tried to make myself go out more, push myself to spend Friday nights in the company of others and try to enjoy all that mindless chit chat that came with money spent on too many drinks.

Soon, I began to hate myself and those around me. I started worrying about insignificant nonsense that shouldn’t bother me.

And after one too many nights spent around everyone but myself, I decided that enough was enough and I would spend as much time alone as I ******* please.

I like my company, even if it’s just a little too much, because there’s something beautiful about being at peace with yourself. There’s something comforting about knowing I can come home to myself every night and love it.

There should be more respect for people who can relish in themselves. There should be more admiration for those who aren’t scared of being alone.

There should be some nice words about the loners and the introverts who are content with themselves and don’t need anyone to feel better.

Because loving your alone time is many times a lot healthier than hating it. Those who bask in their own company are the ones with significantly fewer worries than those who need to be around people to fill that void.

The loners, introverts and asocial people of the world are the ones spending their time creating and growing from themselves, rather than worrying about what everyone else is thinking.

They never worry about how they come off

People who like to be alone are more secure than those who are so good at showing face. They are the ones who are never second guessing their actions or working on their appearance.

They don’t care what people think of them because they, themselves, are their harshest critics.

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They never worry about what they just said

The only times people who like their alone time are going out is with people who deserve their shared time. They don’t spend it with people who will judge them or people they worry about taking what they said the wrong way.

They don’t spend hours lying in their beds thinking about what they said or didn’t say back there. They are confident around the people they choose to talk to.

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They never worry about acting like they have something to prove

People who enjoy their own company are not the types to put on airs. They never have to act like they have something to prove because they never have anyone to prove anything to.

When you meet them, you will see they are completely themselves, because that’s who matters to them. If you don’t like them, that’s just one fewer person they need to worry about hanging out with.

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They’re never worried about doing things they don’t want to do

They don’t sit in bed wishing they didn’t have to go to a party where they hate most of the people just so they won’t spend Saturday night stuck with their own thoughts.

They never replace alone time with empty interactions. Their solitude is never rationalized or bargained for by trivial moments with undeserving people.

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They’re never worried about ending up alone

They don’t have that irrational fear of never finding someone. If anything, they fear they will never understand how to share their alone time.

They don’t date people just for the company or settle for unfulfilled love just so they won’t end up alone.

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They never worry about finding something to say

Because they’re not constantly putting themselves around others, they’re not constantly searching for new topics and talking points.

They know who they are and what they like and they don’t have to pretend to be interested in things just to keep the conversation going.

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They never worry about missing out on something

They never have fear of missing out because there’s no place they’d rather be than with themselves. They don’t find it a wasted evening when they don’t go out.

In fact, they see it as the opposite. In our hectic schedules, getting a night to ourselves is easier said than done.

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They never worry about being single

They search for meaning in themselves and take pride in that relationship. They don’t need to feel validated by the significant others they’re supposed to have.

They make sure they are completely in love with themselves before they worry about finding someone else to love.

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They never worry about needing time to think

They spend their alone time exploring all the unexamined spaces of their mind. They don’t go to parties or friends’ houses wishing they could just have a moment to think, alone.

They are constantly thinking and constantly wondering. They are never without moments to ponder those questions that need time.

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They never worry about having to lie or exaggerate

Their lives are complete by themselves. They don’t have to name drop or worry about being cool enough around the people they’re with because they don’t care about impressing current company or making new acquaintances.

They aren’t about collecting friends or racking up phone numbers. They know who they are and there’s no need to exaggerate about that.

 

 

 

 

 

~via EliteDaily