BARBARA BUCK: “Hiding The Wounded Healer”

Suffering can appear in our lives with little warning. It startles us out of complacency. One day we are swimming with the tide, just breezing through life, then wham! Disease and discord hit us when we aren’t looking. Suddenly our nice dip in the ocean becomes a terrifying race from the sharks that we had no idea were right below the surface.

Hardship in whatever form it manifests, can cause us to lose faith that life is on our side. It can render us incapable of trusting the ebb and flow of reality as we understand it.

When I was diagnosed with a chronic disease, I was utterly blindsided. I am a healing practitioner, so in the beginning stages of being sick I had faith that I would be more than capable of handling the issue and moving on with my life. I had multiple tools to help me.

I did all the work, taking a mind/body/spirit approach to the disease, but instead of getting better, I got worse. I did everything that I knew how to do as a healing practitioner, but all my knowledge was useless in the face of my wretched suffering.

I stopped trusting the process and began to believe that I must have done something horribly wrong to deserve the physical and emotional trauma that I was experiencing.

To top it all off, I had a belief that no one would want to see a healer with a chronic disease. How could anyone put their faith in me to help them, if I couldn’t even heal myself? A sick healer is a paradox.

I spent a good deal of time stoically putting on my best game face while seeking help from other practitioners behind closed doors. Everyone that I knew had plenty of advice to give me, from why I got sick to what might help me get better.

Conventional medicine, naturopaths, homeopaths, nutritionists, spiritual counselors, acupuncturists, biofeedback therapists, energy healers of all different types; you name it, I tried it. I stopped trusting the healthcare industry to give me answers, but the worst part about it all is that I stopped trusting my ability to help myself.

Suffering makes us feel weak, and in that weakness we become vulnerable. It’s a terrifying experience to recognize that no matter what we’ve been taught to believe, there are some things we don’t have control over. Sometimes when we allow ourselves to step into our vulnerability, we can feel like victims, victims to our bodies, our thoughts, our creative process that’s gone awry, to God, to the Universe, to genetics.

I have vacillated back and forth between all of these things. I blamed my ancestors, the environment, but mostly I held myself accountable for this disease. I have a firmly held belief that I am a co-creator of my reality, so clearly I must have made this happen.

I played the self-blame game very well. I decided that I can’t be trusted to care for myself when I am in this open, susceptible state. The Universe can’t be trusted either because it certainly didn’t have my back and stop me from creating this horrible mistake.

It didn’t even give me fair warning.

When we are raw and wounded, the first thing we throw out of the window is usually trust. The most natural reaction to our loss of faith is to wrap ourselves in a protective shell because we are afraid of what might come next. The world no longer feels safe.

When we become ill, whether it’s emotionally, spiritually, or physically, we tend to try to keep the world at a comfortable distance. Instead of stepping into our vulnerability, we hide it under the guise of courage and dignity.

Society rewards stoicism with praise. If we see a cancer patient, we say “Isn’t she brave? She never complains about the pain she’s in. She just keeps fighting. It’s amazing!” Very rarely do we acknowledge it when someone courageously embraces their vulnerability by taking a step into the darkness of their condition and seeing what gifts lie within the murky depths.

When we voice our fears or expose our vulnerability, it can frighten our loved ones. It makes people uncomfortable when they can see our wounds. It makes them remember their mortality and their own ability to suffer.

We often respond to this behavior by hiding behind a courageous mask, when the truth is that it makes us feel guilt, anger, and shame.

It’s time for us as healers to take that mask off. It is impossible to heal if we don’t allow the shadows of our creation to surface for healing, or try to hide them. Ignoring them is no longer an option.

 

Barbara Buck is a Foundational Reconnective Healing Practitioner, writer, and teacher. For more information, please visit her website at http://www.barbarabuck.org

 

~via We Are the Dreamwalkers

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NIKKI SAPP: “Seven Ways to Heal Negative Emotions”

“If God him/her/itself arrived at your doorstep for dinner, how would you treat him/her/it? Most likely with the utmost respect and reverence, right? So now you know how you should treat each emotion that arises as well.”

~Nikki Sapp

 

When you come to a point in your self-awareness process where you are beginning to become acutely aware of the emotional responses that are happening within you day-to-day, you may have found that there is a very fine line between showing support to yourself while you experience painful emotions and attaching yourself to the emotions as a sense of identity.

Walking this line, trying to find a balance between the two proves to be the difference between becoming a confident, healed and self-loving person, rooted in awareness rather than ego or being a victim of life, so intertwined with our painful emotions and the stories attached to them that they become extremely difficult to heal to completion.

While one should never use their idea of “being a positive person” as a means of trying to get rid of the natural emotions that are arising in them by methods of manipulation or judgment, there is undoubtedly approaches in dealing with painful or “negative emotions” that are in fact effective in helping them heal and transform all on their own, which in turn creates the space by which the blissful “positive” emotions that are our inherent nature can arise.

Seven Ways to Heal Negative Emotions

 

1. Acknowledge them

We cannot change that which we deny is even happening, which is why the very initial step to helping to create a space for healing for any emotion is to acknowledge it’s existence. You don’t even have to name the emotion if you are at a point where you can meditate and feel into the energy of the emotion, but nonetheless you must see that it is there.

Most emotions orbit repeatedly in our energy field because they have been feared, rejected or denied which only perpetuates them. When a painful emotion arises, that should tell you a deeper inquiry is required. Simply put, they are arising to be seen so that they can eventually be healed by you.

2. Honor Them

If we know that all stems from source (God/the divine/the omnipresent Universe) we should also know that even painful emotions fit into this category as well. Knowing this is a huge reason why honoring each emotion as God is hugely transformative.

If God him/her/itself arrived at your doorstep for dinner, how would you treat him/her/it? Most likely with the utmost respect and reverence, right?

So now you know how you should treat each emotion that arises as well. While it’s easy to treat joyful emotions with respect, it’s not as so with the emotions that feel painful in our body, but nonetheless that respect is required in assisting these emotions into a place where they can relax and dissolve into our awareness.

3. Do not blame them on anyone/ Do not own them as your own

Here is another approach that can be rather tricky, especially if you are new into self-awareness. Very often our emotions come as an onset after someone else’s behavior or words, which makes it “feel” like that person is to blame for the emotion. On one level of consciousness this may feel true, but those who are seasoned in self-awareness know something that takes this perspective into a higher truth.

That pearl of insight, is that people are coming into our lives to act as catalysts to bring up the very emotions that exist unhealed in our energy field. This means that rather than blaming them for causing the emotion (which completely disempowers us into needing them to change or apologize before we can heal), we can see them as messengers that provide unlikely clues into our own healing.

On the opposite end, we must also not become to attached to the idea of ownership from within either. We are the consciousness behind the emotion, so while there may be a limiting belief that is running a program in our subconscious mind that has been triggered by the action of another, it does not mean we ARE that emotion.

We are simply the awareness who has the power to heal that defunct programming and emotional block by observing it, feeling it, and respecting it — but not owning it.

4. See them as evidence of their opposite vibration

One helpful way to assist in actually having the courage to feel an emotion head on, is to know that emotions dissolve as a way to create space for their opposite to emerge. This means that all unworthiness — when actually faced and felt — is creating the healing space that makes way for worthiness to arise in it’s place.

Anytime you are able to pinpoint what emotion you are having, you can acknowledge it and also bless it with it’s opposite, or even just declare, “I accept that this fear of not having enough is the evidence that space is being created for abundance consciousness. In knowing this, I allow myself to feel this fear completely without judgment as it’s simply healing as I’m feeling it.”

5. Thank Them

As we come to know that no emotion arises as a mistake, we come to see some of the hidden gifts emotional responses contain. One is helping us identify where we are holding onto a subconscious belief or definition that is out of alignment with our highest truth.

All emotions stem from a belief, so no negative emotion can arise without there also being a belief behind it. Knowing this makes these emotions amazing gifts in helping us to re-write our subconscious beliefs!

By taking the time to sit with each emotion and appreciate it for the healing benefits and clues it contains, the emotions begin to soften and reveal their source — meaning the subconscious belief they stemmed from. As we re-write that belief we are able to heal that emotion.

6. Celebrate them

With many things on the spiritual journey it is the most ironic or unheard of approach that actually is effective. Probably the last thing you would ever think to do when a painful emotion arises is celebrate it’s arrival– which is why this approach is also hugely transformational.

Treat it like you truly cherish it’s arrival and are so humbled to have it’s presence and the wisdom it holds in your energy field. Watch how quickly you are able to detach from negativity when you do the one thing that you would have never thought to, which is actually celebrate it’s existence instead of judging or resisting it.

7. Welcome them back home into the light

Imagine your open heart as a doorway into the light for each emotion. As you open your heart and allow yourself to feel the energetic signature of each emotion, what you are actually doing is letting that emotion be welcomed into your heart space, which leads to the light that you are. The light is where all emotions go to heaven so to speak.

You may have heard the word alchemy in relation to the spiritual journey and this approach is exactly what that word means. Alchemists use the light of their true nature to be avenue by which painful emotions are dissolved into space — by simply feeling them to completion and welcoming them into their heart space.

It is important to note that it is most likely that you will need to use more than one or a combination of a few different approaches with each emotion. Nonetheless, it’s also important to remember to honor your humanity in all of this.

It’s often easy to see ourselves spiritual robots here to use our techniques to get rid of all that “negative energy” we don’t want to deal with, but without also honoring the part of us that innocently feels these emotions from a human place, we become the manipulators of our emotions vs. the safe place they long for to return home.

 

~via FractalEnlightenment.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: “Dealing With Never-Ending Change”

There are a lot of things in life that we can avoid and do without but change is not of them. There will always be change, in some form or the other, sneaking up on us.

That being said let us be real for a second and really talk about change. Is it really easy to accept it and adapt to whatever change comes our way?

The answer would be a resounding no. Most people do not do well with change and that is normal. If you are one of those people, breathe and keep reading because I am here with a few ways that might help you cope with change and get on with your life.

Be nice to yourself

We are often pretty unforgiving when it comes to our own selves and consider ourselves to be incompetent when we struggle but when we see someone close to us going through the same stuff, we are sympathetic and kind to them.

What we need to do in these situations is be the same to our own selves. As a human with emotions and feelings, understand that you are allowed to suffer, be sad and not be okay.

Allow yourself that time to find your footing again and be nice to yourself. A little self love can go a long way.

Observe things and pay attention

Life passes by us pretty fast when we are not paying attention but that is not the best way to live. Look around yourself and be informed about what is happening.

This way you become a better balanced individuals and balance always comes in handy. Everything around you at any given moment is meant to be there at that exact moment — these things need your attention.

Start journaling

Writing a journal every day or as much as possible is effective in many ways. It grants you a look into your innermost complexities and thoughts and helps you understand them better.

When you journal every day, you will find that you feel lighter than usual because you have let out everything that you needed to let out.

Breathe and know that you can do anything. Love yourself.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

CONSCIOUS REMINDER: “Understanding September Numerology — Accepting Changes”

The month of September fills us with a new energy. There is a change in the wind that feels fresh, smells of fruits and flowers, and promises a new beginning. This is also the month that signifies an important development according to studies in numerology.

What’s even more interesting is that this year the 9th month falls on master 11, i.e., 2018 (2+0+1+8=11). The transitions are going to be significant in this month and we’ll find some important answers too. It’s a great opportunity for us to understand what has been stopping us from a life of richness and success.

In fact, the entire year, 2018 has revolved around challenging situations. It is also an important call to all of us wherein we need to keep ourselves alert about how we can contribute to the world in some way. At the same time, one must see this time as an opportunity to deal with our own shadows.

Negativity may seep in at this time but it’s important to overcome these. This year, as reiterated earlier has all along been a roller-coaster ride, though gentler than the previous year. It’s essential that we look at the positive aspects than dwell on the failures for too long

According to Ahalya Running Deer, the spiritual teacher, Uranus will be in Taurus beginning from May 2018, up to 7 years. Our faults and failures will become so obvious even to us that we should take time out to redeem them. At the same time, it’s essential that we don’t start worrying about it so much that our progress is hampered. It’s a good time to start a new journey, if only we plan wisely.

Let your spirit guide you; be open to new experiences and changes that this month has to bring for you. The results of following your spirit will surprise you, as you’ll move away from momentary darkness in the soul to a brighter tomorrow.

Understanding September Numerology: Embracing Changes and the Magic of Number 9

According to numerology, 9 as a number represents a spiritual warrior. It is the force that influences the psyche. The change can only come if we start focusing on our inner self, embrace our strengths and weakness and not depend on external validation. We can take inspiration from our own failures and move ahead forward towards a better tomorrow.

If you still don’t believe in the power of number 9, then take out a moment to think of Gandhi. He too was born under the influence of number 9. His date of birth is 2nd October 1869, which when added comes to 2+1+0+1+8+6+9=27 and added further comes to 2+7=9.

So have you decided how you want to walk through September Numerology? This is the time to plan how you want the significance of number 9 to affect your life. Can you feel the change in your life? If you concentrate perhaps you’ll be able to sense the transformation that’s happening around you. What do you think you will do differently this time?

Let’s reflect on the oncoming of September Numerology

Do you want to change something about your life? This could be the best time to go ahead with it. Try meditation, yoga, dance, music, or painting to open up a world of new experiences. Let your boundaries be pushed a little to allow new understandings to enter your life.

Tap your innate energies and let your potential rise to the occasion. Your presence may be instrumental in letting others find their path. Embrace the new energy and join hands with those around you.

 

~via ConsciousReminder.com

MELISA WANDREI: “The Art of Pain — Why the Dark Times Make Life Beautiful”

“But fullness — that is deep in our soul. When we have that, it never leaves. Fullness encompasses everything. It’s what allows us to be fully human in all the raw, real ways.”

~Melisa Wandrei

 

Happiness, and the quest for it, is not all it’s cracked up to be. What I mean is that I think we’re making a mistake in reaching only for happiness, lightness, good days, and good moods.

I think that we’re restricting ourselves.

We’re fishing in an ocean of emotions, looking to only reel in one or two kinds, throwing back the ones we don’t want without even noticing how shockingly beautiful they can be in their strange, confusing way, much like the fascinatingly mysterious fish of the deep sea.

There was a long time in my life when I wanted happiness, so I avoided pain. I wanted to call myself brave, so I didn’t admit I was afraid.

In my search for joy, I pushed away the other emotions I didn’t like, thinking I’d be left with only happiness.

But something was still wrong. I wasn’t full. By denying myself the plethora of emotions and feelings we, as human beings, are supposed to experience, I was only connecting with myself on a surface level.

I spent many of my days trying to achieve a persistent state of peace and happiness, and I wasn’t being honest with myself.

How could I just be happy when my heart was broken in two? When my own dad wouldn’t talk to me anymore? When I was uncertain and afraid of the future and the path I decided to take.

Yet all I wanted was happiness, and I kept pushing away anything else I felt that wasn’t “good.”

It took me a while to realize that I didn’t feel like myself anymore. And that was because I wasn’t. I was pretending to be a flat placard of peace and joy, which isn’t very real, is it?

I realized I was robbing my soul of all the emotions and feelings and desires it should have.

Every feeling and all the changes we go through become precious when we realize they are all necessary, and they create contrasting beauty in our lives.

Would you rather be happy, or would you rather be full inside?

Happiness is fleeting. It flits in and out of our days like a bird, singing a beautiful song that we want to revel in all our life, for one moment while the sky is blue, not to be found on the days with dark clouds on the horizon, heavy winds, and gray skies.

But fullness — that is deep in our soul. When we have that, it never leaves. Fullness encompasses everything. It’s what allows us to be fully human in all the raw, real ways.

We need the contrasts that fullness, not just happiness, provides us. How else can we know true joy if we have never known sorrow? How can we feel and trust the deepest kind of love if we have never felt heartbreak?

In art, this is called chiaroscuro. It’s the play of light and dark within a picture, the idea that you need dark shading on one side in order to notice where the light is supposed to hit on the other.

I believe that art reflects life.

I think that by suppressing emotions we don’t like, such as fear and uncertainty and pain, we are taking away the shading of our own image. We’re denying ourselves the beautiful picture that needs the contrasts and shadows in order to be complete.

Sometimes, two seemingly conflicting emotions can fit together and coexist. Have you ever felt that? Maybe you have pain inside you that you suppressed, and suddenly another person finds a way to gently bring it to the surface.

That person and their kind eyes bring warmth to your heart, even while the pain is being laid bare.

Happiness can fill your chest and sadness can well in your eyes until they are entwined in a beautifully poignant harmony. This is chiaroscuro in its most desired form — the shadow contrasting with the brilliant light, creating a depth and fullness that couldn’t be reached any other way.

Don’t ever think that being so paralyzed by fear you don’t know how to take a step, or feeling angry and betrayed, or sobbing while your heart is in shreds, or feeling lonely or confused or uncertain or whatever you feel, is wrong or not good.

It’s your shading, your shadows, making up the complete, beautifully exquisite image of your soul and your life.

 

 

~via TinyBuddha.com